Easter Morning Yr C (Jn 20:1-18)  04-04-2010

Among the many learning opportunities that are required of someone going through seminary training, I found that the 10 weeks I spent serving as a Chaplain intern especially rewarding. I spent the summer with some wonderful people at a continuing care retirement center in VA. After some introductory training, I was told to spend some time visiting folks in the assisted living and nursing care areas of the center. The vast majority of my visits were made to folks who lived alone, but there was one couple who lived together in one double room. This couple had been married for more than 60 years and I was looking forward to meeting them. I was told that they both suffered from varying degrees of dementia, in addition to other physical challenges, but I would be welcomed to visit them and the nurses were sure I would have a nice visit. As I entered the room, the man warmly greeted me as the woman slept in her bed next to him. He invited me to sit down and we started a nice conversation about many different topics…and throughout our conversation I noticed the room was full of many beautiful and interesting pictures and works of art. I suppose when you condense 60 years of life together in one room, only the most memorable pieces are selected. I asked the gentleman about one particularly beautiful wood carving of a Native American Chief riding on a stallion. He looked at the carving, agreed it was beautiful and then nodded his head toward his sleeping wife. He said, “I guess the carving his hers, I don’t know where she got it from.” I said, “Oh, your wife bought the carving.” He replied, “My wife, oh no, that’s not my wife. I have never seen her before they put us together in this room. I don’t know where my wife is right now.” I was struck by his reply: not because he couldn’t recognize his wife of 60 years – that was caused by the dementia. I was struck by his comment because this man and woman, after more than 60 years together, now lay in this room together, and he had lost his wife. Continue reading →